Hello Anna,
I agree with Caroline, your work was very good but you could have used a few more connectives and adverbs. The use of description was very good so keep up the good work!
From Rafi’s Dad.
I thought your work was really good but needed the use of the five senses. I have also found that you didn’t highlight the word white. Eventhough I had a few critiscms, your work deserves to be up on our blog and I can’t wait for you to produce more work!
Hello Anna,
What an incredible piece of writing you have produced. The description was perfect so keep up the good work!
From Rafi’s Mum.
Hello Anna,
I agree with Caroline, your work was very good but you could have used a few more connectives and adverbs. The use of description was very good so keep up the good work!
From Rafi’s Dad.
I thought your work was really good but needed the use of the five senses. I have also found that you didn’t highlight the word white. Eventhough I had a few critiscms, your work deserves to be up on our blog and I can’t wait for you to produce more work!