Hello Anna,
I have read you work and I liked:
1. All the great adjectives you used, such as, halted, pounded, tumble and crammed…
2. You used a great personification (snow pounded on the roof BEGGING for it to give way).
3. It had a great story-line.
Here are some things that you might want to improve on in your next blog:
1. Shorter sentences (I was wheezing when I had finished reading this).
2. Longer blog.
Keep up the good work and don’t forget to comment and blog some more.
Hi Anna
i think your story is brilliant because you used some really good words for example
halted,pounded.
i can’t wait to read more of your work.
Hello Anna,
I have read you work and I liked:
1. All the great adjectives you used, such as, halted, pounded, tumble and crammed…
2. You used a great personification (snow pounded on the roof BEGGING for it to give way).
3. It had a great story-line.
Here are some things that you might want to improve on in your next blog:
1. Shorter sentences (I was wheezing when I had finished reading this).
2. Longer blog.
Keep up the good work and don’t forget to comment and blog some more.
Hi ANNA its your brother Joe I really liked the opening sentence because of the strong words you have used.