Hi Daniel J, I liked your writing especially the simile bright as a thousand lights. Though you could replace the second emerald green with something else.
I think that the alliteration that you used was fantastic, but you could have given us a bit more description about the Emerald city e.g;what the palace looked like.
Hi Daniel
Great description loved the bit where you described the popcor is politely poping.
Hey Daniel, 😀
I like how you have described the senses and used similes!
My only dispute is that you said “the little people there are” x2. 🙁
Hi Daniel J, I liked your writing especially the simile bright as a thousand lights. Though you could replace the second emerald green with something else.
Hi Daniel,
I think that the alliteration that you used was fantastic, but you could have given us a bit more description about the Emerald city e.g;what the palace looked like.
Hugo