Hi Maud,
You have written a realy quality peice of work here. I like it when you use words such as ‘cautiously’ , ‘velvety’ and ‘glinting’. Your work reminded me of a time when I hid my sweets thinking they where my sisters and they got all muddy in the garden. I suppose that what you get from playing tricks.
Although your work is amazing may I just ask a few questions where I think you have made a mistake? If the girl had forgotten it was Easter how could she know there where going to be Easter eggs? And how could her face be sinister and cheeky at the same time? But otherwise great work!
Hi Maud,
This peice of writing is amazing! I love all the descriptive words that you have used, for example velvety,smooth and cheeky sinister face! I think you have great punctuation and it creates a picture in my head.
The things you could improve on is there is a bit in the writing where you said “So i came searching “.
I think it should have been ” So i went searching”. Other than that it is great !
I really enjoyed your writing, it is very exciting and i think the description of Easter is great!
I would have loved your writing even more if you actually did an adventure in your garden rather than just running outside and by the time you found it, it was melted.
Your post was very good and interesting to read.
Great job!
Hi Maud
What a great piece of writing with some wonderful vocabulary. You have obviously thought very carefully about the words for this week’s prompt and used them in a really interesting way. I particularly liked your decriptions – lip licking treats, wonderful!
Hi Maud,
You have written a realy quality peice of work here. I like it when you use words such as ‘cautiously’ , ‘velvety’ and ‘glinting’. Your work reminded me of a time when I hid my sweets thinking they where my sisters and they got all muddy in the garden. I suppose that what you get from playing tricks.
Although your work is amazing may I just ask a few questions where I think you have made a mistake? If the girl had forgotten it was Easter how could she know there where going to be Easter eggs? And how could her face be sinister and cheeky at the same time? But otherwise great work!
Hi Maud,
This peice of writing is amazing! I love all the descriptive words that you have used, for example velvety,smooth and cheeky sinister face! I think you have great punctuation and it creates a picture in my head.
The things you could improve on is there is a bit in the writing where you said “So i came searching “.
I think it should have been ” So i went searching”. Other than that it is great !
I really enjoyed your writing, it is very exciting and i think the description of Easter is great!
I would have loved your writing even more if you actually did an adventure in your garden rather than just running outside and by the time you found it, it was melted.
Your post was very good and interesting to read.
Great job!
Hi Maud
What a great piece of writing with some wonderful vocabulary. You have obviously thought very carefully about the words for this week’s prompt and used them in a really interesting way. I particularly liked your decriptions – lip licking treats, wonderful!