The hipponoserous is NOT the type of animal I would like to meet on a dark night. You’ve used a range of adjective to make it sound really frightening!
I like the way you used the ellipses to prepare your readers for what this terrible creature might be. What a great imagination you have.
Hippos are my very favorite animal in the world, so I was excited when you started with one. Your description is very clear, and the adjectives and adverbs are really well chosen. Remember, when you want to say It IS, you use the apostrophe. When it has something, or owns something, or feels something, the way to write this is Its. But that is a tiny mistake in an otherwise lovely entry. Congrats!
i like you similes and your alliterations.
also i like your … or your elipes
Hi Alice
The hipponoserous is NOT the type of animal I would like to meet on a dark night. You’ve used a range of adjective to make it sound really frightening!
I like the way you used the ellipses to prepare your readers for what this terrible creature might be. What a great imagination you have.
Hippos are my very favorite animal in the world, so I was excited when you started with one. Your description is very clear, and the adjectives and adverbs are really well chosen. Remember, when you want to say It IS, you use the apostrophe. When it has something, or owns something, or feels something, the way to write this is Its. But that is a tiny mistake in an otherwise lovely entry. Congrats!