Hi Nathalie,
Wow! I absolutely loved that piece of writing! Your imagination really
shined through that piece! I like it when you say, “It was as fresh as
pure mineral water you would buy at tesco”. I also thought that your
writing was very funny, especially at the ending!
Well done!!!
Hi Nathalie,
I really liked your work!
You could really see your hard work and amazing imagination
it glowed through that piece! ,
I like it when you say,
“It was as fresh as pure mineral water you would buy at Tesco”.
and how you described the companions.
you did a great peace of work
congratulations!!!
What a brilliant piece of work. You used some excellent language and your puncuation was top notch! My only criticism is that you made a couple of spelling mistakes.
I really liked your piece of work and the metaphor about the carpet being like water is great! Also the lemonade saying “Drink me” is a perfect way of using personification!
Hey Nathalie,
Nice description and I loved the way you used that personification!
Although next time you could describe the Emerald city and her comrades a bit more.
I really enjoyed your descriptions of the Emerald City, your writing really helped to paint a picture of what it was like and waht it felt like to be there. Great work and very unique descriptions.
Hi Nathalie,
Wow! I absolutely loved that piece of writing! Your imagination really
shined through that piece! I like it when you say, “It was as fresh as
pure mineral water you would buy at tesco”. I also thought that your
writing was very funny, especially at the ending!
Well done!!!
Thanks Gabriella. I feel more confident about my wrighting now because of your comment.
Hi Nathalie,
I really liked your work!
You could really see your hard work and amazing imagination
it glowed through that piece! ,
I like it when you say,
“It was as fresh as pure mineral water you would buy at Tesco”.
and how you described the companions.
you did a great peace of work
congratulations!!!
What a brilliant piece of work. You used some excellent language and your puncuation was top notch! My only criticism is that you made a couple of spelling mistakes.
Hello,
It was very funny and you used good words like silently.
Hi Nathalie,
I really enjoyed reading your work, I like your description, Dorothy’s merry turquoise eyes.
Next time you could use a metaphor.
Thank you Holly. I’ll take your improvement on board.
Hi Nathalie,
I really liked your piece of work and the metaphor about the carpet being like water is great! Also the lemonade saying “Drink me” is a perfect way of using personification!
Brilliant!
I relay loved reading this, especially liked the tesco bit hope to see your next blog!!!
Hey Nathalie,
Nice description and I loved the way you used that personification!
Although next time you could describe the Emerald city and her comrades a bit more.
Thank you Luca. I’ll bear that improvement in mind.
To Natalie well done you have used personification and it is humerus .
Thank you Hermione. your description of the story being humerous made me think positevely about my wrighting.
Hi Natalie,
I really enjoyed your descriptions of the Emerald City, your writing really helped to paint a picture of what it was like and waht it felt like to be there. Great work and very unique descriptions.