STAMPEDE!

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6 Responses to STAMPEDE!

  1. Alex C says:

    I reallly liked the word “demolished” and also put alot of adjectives and I thought it was absouletley perfect.

  2. Olivia says:

    Wow! This peice of writing is AMAZING the words are so desciriptive and it creates such a great picture in my head!
    I think the punctuation is good and i like the alliteration but maybe you could have written a bit about maybe the people around you if there were any.
    Well done!

  3. Alex says:

    That is an absolutely outstanding piece of work, I can’t believe that your writing at this standard. Fabulous description and adjectives, you even involved alliteration at the start. I cannot find anything wrong with this poem, well done !

  4. Lucas says:

    Hello Rafi. I thought your short story was very descriptive and it drew me in and kept me reading. You used some good adjectives. I couldn’t find anything you could improve on, I thought it was amazing.

  5. Mariana says:

    Hello Rafi,
    AMAZING!!!! I just could not believe my eyes! You are a born writer! I loved the way you described the suset and the farm and the way the animals stampeded across the farm you were looking at. I really believed I was there and that I had ran away with fright. FANTASTIC!!!!

  6. Marlena says:

    WOW! beautiful description, you sure did create a picture in my head. I felt the scarce feeling of the stampede actually coming towards me. This peice of writing really blew me away. I like your use of commas when you made a list of the animals. I loved your word purity and i don’t think you needed to include PURE purity because it’s saying the the same word again. To sum up I thought this is the best i’ve seen so far really well done.

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