Goodness! What a sad ending! A great piece of writing. You did a great job punctuating your speech. Don’t forget to read your work through just to check you haven’t missed any full stops and capital letters – it’s really easy to do. You chose some very unusual names for your characters – where do they come from? Take care choosing which type of there/their to use. I always think of it like this; there contains the word here – here and there. Whereas their is it belongs to them. Keep writing, I look forward to reading your next entry. 🙂
Oh, wow! You have written a story with quite a bit of suspense. I kept wondering what would happen next. I love the names you chose for your characters too. I hope you will keep writing stories as you are very good at it. Some of your sentences were a bit long, so I think you could split them in two. Making words past tense can be a bit tricky too since most of the time you have to double the last consonant. For example to make “stop” past tense, it is “stopped”. Practice that a bit with some of your favourite verbs and you’ll get the hang of it.
Goodness! What a sad ending! A great piece of writing. You did a great job punctuating your speech. Don’t forget to read your work through just to check you haven’t missed any full stops and capital letters – it’s really easy to do. You chose some very unusual names for your characters – where do they come from? Take care choosing which type of there/their to use. I always think of it like this; there contains the word here – here and there. Whereas their is it belongs to them. Keep writing, I look forward to reading your next entry. 🙂
That was great Mia. I liked your character names and I enjoyed the ending.But watch your spelling.
Oh, wow! You have written a story with quite a bit of suspense. I kept wondering what would happen next. I love the names you chose for your characters too. I hope you will keep writing stories as you are very good at it. Some of your sentences were a bit long, so I think you could split them in two. Making words past tense can be a bit tricky too since most of the time you have to double the last consonant. For example to make “stop” past tense, it is “stopped”. Practice that a bit with some of your favourite verbs and you’ll get the hang of it.
Looking forward to seeing more of your stories!